Stupidity, Ignorance Same Difference
by AppleL0V3R
Summary: Sakura found herself on the cold, wet ground of a dark alley surrounded by a bunch of weapon wielding, hungry-eyed looking thugs and yet all she could think about was throbbing ass. EdSaku. Naruto/FMA x-over. non-mass. Will become active Nov 23rd, 2011
1. Chain Reaction

**Title:** Stupidity, Ignorance; Same Difference

**Author:** AppleL0V3R

**Fandom:** Naruto and Full Metal Alchemist

**Pairing:** Edward, Elric and Haruno, Sakura

**Chapter:** One – Chain Reaction

**Rating:** T

**Type:** Story – Incomplete

**Summary:** Sakura found herself on the cold, wet ground of a dark alley surrounded by a bunch of weapon wielding, hungry-eyed looking thugs and yet all she could think about was her throbbing ass.

**Word Count:** 1,227

**Disclaimer:** If you've heard of it before, then it's obviously not mine.

..:Xx0o0xX:..

Sakura knew she had a bad feeling about this mission.

When Team 7 first got the mission she felt uneasy the feel like something bad was going to happen. The day had already started off hectic with the constant feeling of foreshadowing. Still she had brushed it off, just writing it off as the aftermath of not eating that morning.

A bad idea.

Now though it was obvious to see that she should have listened to her gut feeling. Not only had everything been a set up but the scroll had had a chain reaction.

They were simply supposed to get an important scroll from Point A, Konoha, to Point B, Suna. Simple. That's what the mission had seemed, Naruto had even complained. But this wasn't the first time nor would it ever be the last time nothing went according to plan.

A days travel away from Suna's gates Sound nin had ambushed her five man team consisting of Hatake, Kakashi, Uzumaki, Naruto, Uchiha, Sasuke, Sai and herself.

Sakura wished she had expressed her unease to Tsunade-shishou when she had the chance, but she hadn't and that had been mistake number two. Now hopefully she knew to listen to her instincts instead of ignoring them. Perhaps that is why humans have them. Perhaps they are a defense mechanism for the body because it has no other means of giving humans a forewarning. Though they aren't always logical and can be categorized as something else the powerful kunoichi now realizes, as a ninja, listening to your gut is proximately the smartest thing you can do. If its wrong then it's better to be safe than sorry, and the misunderstanding can most likely always be worked out. Being dead can't.

The scroll in Sakura's medical pouch had started to glow a blue color. Sakura had been chosen to harbor the scroll because she could protect it better than her teammates since they would surely get themselves hurt and damaged and the last thing on their minds would have been the scroll.

When the glow had made itself seen the sound nin backed off and Sakura's comrades could only stare as Sakura pulled the parchment out for everyone to see. Then her world went black as she felt her body go limp and fall backwards.

..:Xx0o0xX:..

Sakura jack knifed into a sitting position just as her ass started to ache terribly. She kept her eyes squeezed shut as she moved her slightly pained arm to rub her rear end. It felt as though she had been dropped from a couple feet in the air. So not good for the butt because it took the full brunt of the fall. Well aching butts aside Sakura found herself on the cold, wet ground of a dark alley surrounded by five thugs. She didn't need to look to know that their eyes were hungrily watching her every move and had weapons ready encase she put up a fight. She was completely unnerved and disgusted at this piece of knowledge and peeved at the last bit.

Sakura restrained a sigh knowing that this would be a pain in the ass to figure out why she was in a stone covered alley instead of a sandy, desert landscape. She stood to her feet ignoring her still throbbing ass and opened her emerald colored eyes to face her latest predicament. Her instincts had been correct the five thugs were oversized in both height and weight and they looked worse then ugly with an unbearable stench coming off of them in almost seeable waves.

The pink haired kunoichi wrinkled her small button of a nose and took a deep breath through parted cherry full lips and held the breath in as she strode forward in an attempt simply bypass the ugly men. They didn't seem to like that for the one in the middle made a grab for her shoulder length hair. Before Sakura could duck out of the way of the offending hand, a black boot with a red lining along the bottom smashed into the man's face sending him into his fellow thug on what would be his left.

The thugs scrambled screaming boss, but could do nothing as they were suddenly encased in two rock shaped hands that sprouted up form the cobblestone. Two in the left and three in the right.

Turning her attention to the source of the thugs' quick encasement she found a boy and a suit of armor.

The boy looked around thirteen or fourteen years of age. He has long blonde hair that appears to be braided, making it so Sakura couldn't see where his hair stopped. She wondered briefly if it was as long as Neji's. Probably. He also has honey brown eyes that look as though they are checking Sakura over as well. Blondie – his temporary name until she finds out the real one – is wearing a black shirt, though the rosette can't tell how long, and pants that reach black rubber shoes that are obviously boots with thick souls with, as she had earlier glimpsed, red out lining the bottom. Over his clothes is an open red coat that reaches his feet and white gloves covering his hands.

The suit of armor is quiet large. Blondie only reaches the suit's mid arm, though honestly the golden eyed boy does seem short for his approximated age. The suit is gray with a light blue cloth tied around its waist. The armor also has white strips of cloth that seem as though they originate inside the armors head. Other than that it's your average armor. Why is someone wearing armor? Who's inside it? The teenage kunoichi couldn't help but wonder.

Straightening out Sakura placed a smile on her face.

"Hey you, you should be more careful." Blondie stated bluntly obviously talking to Sakura sounding in the range of the her estimated guess for his age.

"Brother!" a young male voice exclaimed from inside the suit at Blondie for his rude bluntness. So whoever is inside of that armor is Blondie's brother. Most likely younger, by one year at most if his voice was anything to go by. That doesn't answer why the teenager is in the armor though.

"What?" Blondie questioned the armor not seeing the problem with his earlier statement. Then he returned his attention to the girl with shoulder length pink hair. "Who are you?"

Sakura didn't even flinch her green, emerald-like eyes at his blunt rudeness. "Don't you know its common courtesy to give your name before asking for another's?"

Blondie growled at her while the armor seemed to snicker at her commentary. "Fine my name's Elric, Edward and this is Elric, Alphonse"

The unique hair colored fifteen year old girl's smile never faltered "Well, then hello Edward and Alphonse, my name is Haruno, Sakura and it's a pleasure to meet you. Oh, thanks for helping me."

* * *

Yeah I redid this chapter because I was looking over the last one and was horrified with all my mistakes so here you go, it's been fixed. For those of you reading it for the first time tell me what you think. Review please. Criticism is forever welcome.


	2. Minning Town

**Beta-reader:** Terror-Of-The-Crimson-Night

**Chapter:** Two – Mining Town

**Type:** Story – Incomplete

**Word Count:** 2,070

**Disclaimer:** If you've heard of it before, then it's obviously not mine.

**Note:** From Sakura's POV

..:Xx0o0xX:..

I trailed behind Edward and Alphonse quietly. I was just observing my surroundings, and the unfamiliar buildings and busty people quickly told me that announcing I am a ninja wouldn't be the wisest idea. So, I decided keeping a low profile in that aspect would be the smarter course of action. At least until I found my boys. Well that is _if_ my boys are here.

Where ever the hell here is anyway. "So" I started. They seemed just fine keeping the silence, and I would have been too, but I was curious. "Where are we?"

Both boys looked at me like I'd grown a head or something. Oops. Not the question that I should've asked, I'm guessing. Great, now what do I say?

"Youswell." Edward answered.

Thankful that he'd let it go I nodded, determined not to make a fool of myself. "I see. Sorry. I have a selective memory."

"You mean like selective hearing?" The blonde asked with an eyebrow raised and a smirk on his features. Hey, I like this one.

I nodded with a smile and a chuckle, "Something like that. I suppose my brain rejected that name of this town…what was it again?" I was making a point, I really did know but when you're a shinobi for as long as I have been you get used to actually making anything you want look like the complete and utter truth. And yeah I did feel bad for tricking them this way, but it can't be helped. If it's necessary for me to be alive…

"Youswell." This time it was Alphonse who'd answered.

What worried me was that I couldn't quite tell if the elder brother believed me or not. Either he's sharp or has good instincts. No matter which way you spell it won't exactly be good for me. It's like dealing with civilians that are accustomed to ninjas, they require a lot more effort to fool. And if it's both…well then I suppose I'd better watch my steps. Which would mean I can't ask what the hell he'd done back there. Last I checked light blue sparks – that looked almost the same as the one that had come from the scroll, which I still need to look at – don't come out when you're doing an earth jutsu, and I'm not even sure that was a jutsu at all.

The whole ordeal had definitely conjured multiple questions, none of which my gut said were safe to ask. Not until I was on solid ground again at least. And there was simply no way I will forgo my gut feeling a second time. I won't make the same mistake twice. I can't afford to.

"Right. See?" I responded still smiling. "Since were on the subject of locations, do you mind if I ask where it is that your heading?"

"After I wrap up some lose ends here, I plan to go to Central." and three questions popped into my head at once.

Of course I could only ask one of them. The other two pertained to Central. And I'm pretty damn sure that ask where that was would constitute blowing my charade that for the time being I have to stick to. I've already slipped up once, knowingly or not. And I should have known. You don't end up in some alley surrounded by thugs and not even know where the hell it is that you are. It just doesn't happen. "Lose ends?" I asked. That was the third question and completely valid. Unless of course he started thinking I was being to nosey…can't have that either.

"Yeah with the governor of this town." He answered again nonchalantly with a shrug of his shoulders as if it was no big deal. And maybe to him it wasn't, but I had to stop and think about what a governor was, they were head of a colony or something in that vicinity right? So this governor is in charge of this town. I'd say that Edward has some status to his name if a governor of a town is only lose ends to him.

Though I could be a little mixed up, last I checked, a governor doesn't stay in a tavern lodging place. Still I followed the Elric brothers in. I was in no place to object nor did I have any protests…maybe they'll let me take a bath. I feel kinda grimy now that I think about it. What threw me off was the first thing the blonde said upon entering "Make a line if you owe money." They all made sour faces in response.

Was I off on his character? Am I losing my touch?

"What do you want?" A little boy shouted rather rudely. Correction people just don't like him here. Though why would be a good question to ask.

Edward turned his face to the side, striking a pose that was the picture of mischief. I would know, what with Naruto and all. "Now is that anyway to treat the owner of this place?"

Yep. He's up to something. What though, I don't know. One of the disadvantages to entering into situation I know nothing about. So I simply lingered by the door, leaning against the wall and watched the scene unfold before me. Casually observing everyone in the room. All of them were just as big as those thugs from before, they must be miners; if their tools all around are anything to go by. A bunch of picks and hammers.

"What the hell?!" the man to the boy's right – form my vantage point at least – shouted, looking miffed and slightly disbelieving. So the teen in black and red shoved a stack of papers at him. They're probably the deeds.

Disbelief quickly turned to shock as whatever he was reading registered. "…but…this…"

"Yep! All the deeds to every business here." Blondie stated looking cheeky as he did so.

Wow. He and Naruto are _a lot_ alike. No wonder I took to him so easily.

"Why do you have those? Wait…they're signed to Elric, Edward!"

"What?!?!" the kid and the man on the other side of him – if I didn't know better I'd say they were father and son. – shouted in unison.

"This coal mine is mine" the new owner announced loudly and smugly.

Now there was a collective 'no way' as jaws dropped. Quite honestly it was really funny to watch. I'd never really cared to be a bystander in any situation so I've never had such an experience.

In response the red coat with the odd question mark and circle like design clad boy shrugged. "I know. I mean what could I do with a bunch of deeds? They're only excess baggage to me."

The father stepped forth looking determined as he did so. Obviously this place was important to him. "How much are you going to sell it for?"

Then I watched amusedly, trying hard not to laugh as he made a show of how much it cost with the examples of how the storage box has a fine design carved in jade and how the vellum embossed is gold. The looks he was getting were priceless. I'm pretty sure that he's laughing his ass off on the inside. But what price he'd set had thrown me off – as I'm beginning to learn that he's unexpected just like Naruto– for he'd only asked for two meals for three and one night's stay

Both father and son looked surprised beyond all reason before the elder broke out laughing. "Oh yeah. That's expensive. I'll take it!"

"Sold!" Edward exclaimed right back dropping the documents on top of a barrel that the man – the tavern owner, as I'm now guessing – had just slammed his fist into.

And the next moment the entrance door banged open to reveal three men. "Sir Alchemist! What is the meaning of this?"

"What, this? Well I just sold the deed to this man, First Lieutenant." So Edward goes by Alchemist huh? I've never heard such a term before. Perhaps it has something to do with those bright blue sparks and hands forming from the earth earlier. I'll have to wait and figure it out. As well as what the hell a first lieutenant is…

"What?!" Do people make a habit out of exclaiming 'what' after this particular guy says something? Or does he intentionally do that? "Well, no matter. What happened to the gold bricks you gave me? There just stones!" I gave a low whistle inside my head, gold bricks is a lot of money to all just go up in smoke. I wonder…

Alphonse whispered something to Edward which made the guy grin smugly as well as something about 'changing' and 'before we left'. Not of course that any of it was making any sense to me.

Then to the lieutenant he responded in a singy-song tone "I have no idea what you're talking about." I snorted, I don't need to know this guy to know that he's lying. Just like Naruto I swear.

"Don't play innocent!" the man yowled, beginning to become outraged "you paid me a ton of gold bricks in exchange for the deed."

Now the blonde was just being sadistic. "No, look here. You signed it over free of charge and with a memorandum." He stated still acting innocent as he pointed to said words on the said paper. Oh great. Nothing more dangerous then a sadistic guy acting innocent.

"What?" and here we go again. Fed up the man pointed, "This is a transaction! You two," he gestured to the only two with him "take back the de–" he paused and lost all his courage, wilting immediately as one of the miners stood before him smiling that all-knowing-smile "–ed"

"Taking private property by force is a no-no" the bearded man informed still smiling.

"This wouldn't happen to be abuse of authority, would it?" another man pitched in. I got the distinct feeling that this first lieutenant guy was just recently in charge but was fooled into selling away his position then tried to demand it back and now the town's people are throwing his own words back in his face. Certainly a good cause, there Edward, I thought appraisingly while keeping in the background able to see everything.

"S-silence and get out of the way before you get hurt." The fool's got a bit of bravery though; I've got to give him that. But since it's to the point of idiocy it doesn't really count for much. Obviously he wasn't a fighter, just by his stance I could tell that. And he was clearly afraid with the way he was backing away from the large very muscular men before him. He couldn't win and wasn't trying for a good enough cause. He didn't care about the town so fighting for it would be a waste of his time and he wouldn't be putting in enough effort to actually _try_. Very idiotic indeed.

Now the whole group was starting to look smug. Tool in hand, the bearded man cracking his knuckles with a grin set upon his face. "You shouldn't underestimate a coal miner, First Lieutenant" No. No you should not.

Now the three uniform clad men lost all confidence and were easily beaten down.

"Oh and I forgot" Edward started, looking at the lieutenant. "I'll tell the higher-ups of your incompetence." That was the last straw as the man sank to his knees "please take it from there" So innocent seeming, yet so cruel. I chuckled while shaking my head. Poor fellow, you picked a bone with the wrong person this time.

And immediately "Bring the beer! The beer!" they were celebrating, pulling their teen hero right into the center of it.

"Dad." My sharp ears picked up and I couldn't help but slightly tilt my head to better hear the boy, registering in the back of my mind that my assumption had proved true. "Ed didn't go so far as to sell his soul."

"Yeah, you're right."

Sell his soul…to what exactly? I wondered, before quietly exiting the tavern.

Well, I'd best get moving if I want to find my boys. At least it was fun while it lasted.

* * *

Thanks for reading, review please, criticism is forever welcome.


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